Your anxiety about the future
It’s totally normal to have occasional panics over when you’ll reach the altar or cradle a newborn of your own, but it is better to seek comfort from someone who is emotionally invested in you, like a friend or family member. “Assuming a hetero fling, guys can get twitchy about women wanting a long-term commitment when all they signed up for was ‘fun,’” explains Claudia Six, PhD, a sexologist, relationship coach, and author of Erotic Integrity. “There’s nothing wrong with wanting these things, but disclosing them to a casual lover will dampen the sexy fun you could be having.”
Your body insecurities
Also normal: having a laundry list of insecurities (we all do). But try to forget your flaws in bed. Not only is it an unsexy topic of conversation, but Dr. Six notes that talking about your cellulite or tummy rolls can also be a manipulative tactic: “It puts the other person in the position of refuting your concerns, and you’re likely not going to take in their compliments anyway,” she says. Instead, own your body. “Our sexual partners don’t care nearly as much as we do about how we look—they care about enthusiasm,” she adds.
Your grooming habits
“The only sexy thing about grooming is the result,” says Dr. Six. In other words, your hookup buddy doesn’t need to know all the dirty details of the Brazilian wax that left your nether region bare. On the other hand, if you choose not to wax or shave, you do not owe your sexual partner an explanation of why.
The number of people you’ve slept with
Unless this person is someone you see yourself getting serious with, there is no need to reveal the number of notches you’ve etched on your bedpost. “A little mystery doesn’t hurt, and keeping them guessing can boost their ardor,” says Dr. Six. It forces you to be in the present moment and enjoy it for what it is, she adds. What is important, though, is discussing your sexual health and disclosing any STIs (past or present).
Read full article in Glam.com
