Well great news: quick results as everything worked fine last night. I took several of your suggestions: open eyes and “go big” in my thoughts, and voila success! So thank you very much for your insight and very helpful suggestions. Hoping to get more wins over the next few weeks. Thanks very much again. (April 2015)
Dr. Six — I am SO happy now. Not just with myself, but with this new man. You may not realize because we saw you so briefly, but you really helped us.
I wanted to share the fun news with you that X and I got married this month. Thank you so much for all of your help. We never would have gotten to this day without you.
P. July 2021
You are erudite and forthright and supportive. Thank you, Claudia. Your understanding of my situation and drawn conclusions you expressed to me are so much appreciated. I needed that.
T.
Clinical Sexologist Dr. Claudia Six presents a fascinating journey through the support and solutions that can make it possible for us to grow into a life of easy and loving fulfillment of desire. The goal is in the title: Erotic Integrity, she teaches us, is unique to each individual and expressed in diverse ways in each relationship. She shows us the growth and progress of her clients in dealing with a variety of difficulties that can afflict our sexualities, and guides them in exploring and manifesting their own erotic integrity.
This book will calm the secret fears of even casual readers, as Six speaks with authority, compassion, and humor: “The term ‘sex addiction’ has been popularized, overused, and misapplied to anyone engaging in sexual behavior that someone else disapproves of.” She’s also critical of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders and clearly explains how and why she thinks it’s inaccurate in certain cases. Overall, she’s emphatic that no obstacle is insurmountable, that no honestly confessed desire is shameful, and that no one need follow anyone else’s choices. Sexuality, she emphasizes, takes place in the heart and in the head—as well as elsewhere. A bold, refreshing call to discover and own one’s sexuality.
You told me what others didn’t. You made me think.
While initially X and I thought we were working through sexual issues, we soon acknowledged that both of us were struggling to stay afloat in a relationship of ever deepening intimacy. My willingness to have a session with you helped me find the courage to speak more openly with X about my own fears of losing control, letting go, and allowing love in. Me speaking from the heart about sex and love helped her to do the same. Always growing closer, learning more, lovingly more deeply, and that is something we both are enjoying. Thanks for your insight and support.
You, Doctor, are great. Thank you. I appreciate you got pull and don’t doubt it. You are formidable in a good way! Fortunately for us weak mortals who need some fucking direction in life.
Erotic Integrity is a fascinating journey into the depths of male and female sexuality. Along the way, Claudia Six provides a deeper understanding of our sexual needs that can inspire and insure lasting love and passion. Read it and enjoy.
Thanks for all your help so far. I read “Journal of Best Practices.” It helped get the conversation going about empathy.
Thank you for giving up part of your Saturday during the holidays to spend time with me. Your gift of sharing your time and wisdom with me was warmly received. You made me a better person today…because I know myself better and because I feel empowered to act authentically in my relationship. The sad news is that I’m very pessimistic about my chances with X, but I am not about to quit trying…I’m just going to quit lying about my sexuality.
It is funny how quickly things unraveled for both of us once we each let go of our bad relationships. I will send you a photo of our wedding. Thank you for all your support and great advice…..you were right! Wishing you a very happy Thanksgiving. We have much to be thankful for. (Nov 2015)
Thank you for all that you do for me, even kicking my ass, I am truly thankful.
Through her candor, unconditional acceptance, and clinical guidance, Dr. Six allows her readers to safely explore the many facets of their sexuality and empowers self-acceptance. She then encourages her readers to practice ‘erotic integrity’ through open communication, honesty, and mutual respect for their partners. As a clinician working with patients suffering from pelvic floor disorders, I know that shame and embarrassment often become an obstacle to seeking help and committing to their recovery. This book will be an excellent resource.
We live in a time when traditional ideas about marriage, relationship, sexual identity, and gender identity are all rapidly evolving. Dr. Claudia Six’s book is a timely and valuable aid to rediscovering, reawakening, and celebrating the power and beauty of our authentic sexual self.
Well great news: quick results as everything worked fine last night. I took several of your suggestions: open eyes and “go big” in my thoughts, and voila success! So thank you very much for your insight and very helpful suggestions. Hoping to get more wins over the next few weeks. Thanks very much again. (April 2015)
Dr. Claudia Six’s new book Erotic Integrity is a helpful guide to anyone, female, male, or otherwise, coming to terms with the honest sexual self which remains to be discovered in each of us. Clearly, gently, and nonjudgmentally she covers the topics that all of us sex therapists see every day—insecurity, performance issues, meeting partners, mating successfully and doing each and any of them while remaining true to one self, with what she terms Erotic Integrity.
I cannot believe what is happening. I am crying really hard right now. I never ever thought this day would come. I cannot believe what you have done for me. It is a miracle. (Jan 2015)
I want to thank you again for the help you are giving A and me. It has made such a difference in our relationship. Thanks so much! (Jan 2015)
I cannot believe what is happening. I am crying really hard right now. I never ever thought this day would come. I cannot believe what you have done for me. It is a miracle. (Jan 2015)
Thank you, Thank you Thank you, that went almost perfect. I cannot believe how many different ways you have changed my life. You deserve an award or something. (Jan 2015)
Take this book to bed with you, curl up with your main squeeze and a glass of wine, and you will be surprised by what you didn’t know about erotic integrity.
Take a journey through the complex terrain of eroticism with Dr. Six. You won’t be sorry. Her engaging style allows you to explore often-scary impulses with a positive attitude. Claudia is a masterful guide who challenges all of us to be in integrity with ourselves. Sexual growth has never been so comfortable and engaging!
I want to thank you again for the help you are giving A and myself. It has made such a difference in our relationship. (Jan 2015)
Dr. Six — I am SO happy now. Not just with myself, but with this new man. You may not realize because we saw you so briefly, but you really helped us. Although, I am sure X would have preferred we stay together at that time and we both feel we wish we could keep our family together, it wasn’t working. (Dec 2014)
(My ex husband) has faded into the background quite a bit, and my boundaries with him are much stronger (I’m sure those things are related), so that side of things is good! (Thank you!) Sex-wise, I also have to report that I’ve finally been able to ask (my boyfriend) to use that Hitachi Magic Wand on me and have practiced pure receiving… and it was really AWESOME!!! (Thank you for that too!)
You have been very important in our healing…you have a very special talent…and you did pick your passion as a career and it shows…you have a very caring heart.
I want to thank you for the work you did on both of us. I think it did help get us to where we are now, which some may see as a failure, but we do not. THANK YOU, for starting the healing process for us. We are not at the end of the road, but we both have achieved a level of acceptance of our situation. Had it not been for you, I don’t think we would be able to look at each other and still smile. I hope you are available for my next relationship, if that ever happens. I am going to preempt problems by seeing you first.
I wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart for seeing me! Not only that, your therapy is superb. I have been to a lot of therapists over the years and I like and appreciate your style. It was quite helpful to talk and to feel heard and to feel like I have an ally.
My growth and development in this relationship, and now outside it…I owe to you (and to me, and to him)… but it all began with you. I will never forget you saying at our first session “whether you get divorced or stay married, if you don’t address these issues, you’ll repeat them in every relationship forever.” Well, I am thrilled, because I know that I allowed a lot of what happened with Mark to happen TO me…without boundaries. I have started dating and now find myself concerned first and foremost with what works for me, where that line is, and being firm and unapologetic (without being abrasive) about my needs. I am a better communicator, and I am grateful to you for all that you did for me in my life. Thanks Claudia – may you continue to influence others in a positive way for many years to come – you’re a gift!
I read your article in the Common Ground and really liked it. What sets your articles like this one apart from many that I’ve read is that you always put the focus on the individual and how they can be responsible their own healing and wellness. There’s never a reference to the evils of the media, messy childhood etc.
I just want to say THANK YOU SO MUCH. The session yesterday took hundreds pounds of my chest. It REALLY DID. THANK YOU.
With regards to our relationship, A and I have seemed to have turned a positive corner and most of the credit goes to you. You helped us realize who we are and how we communicated with each other. You will be the one we call when things get rough down the road as you’ve done a great job is a short period of time. Thank you for all your help.
Dr. Six helped me more in just a few sessions with the most difficult issues in my life than the dozen different therapists I’ve seen over forty years regarding these same issues. As a mediator and life-long student of conversation and communication, I deeply appreciated her skill at listening to my wife and me on many levels from intrapersonal to somatic to contextual to complex interpersonal dynamics. The timing, perception, and depth of her interventions were pitch-perfect and held with just the right balance of heart and clarity, wisdom and humility. She has mastered her craft.
Claudia I can’t thank you enough for helping me get through this tough time in my life….I can move on at least and realize the total scope of the situation….
I’m grateful that you helped me learn a little bit more about myself, and how to be a better partner to a woman.
You’re the best! And you’re making a big difference in our lives. Thank you!
After learning from you that men need to be set up to win, I realized that I had set up my father so that he could not win with me. Using that revelation, I approached our relationship differently, and figured out ways of asking him for things that he could give, and doing things with him that he could do. As a result we have drastically improved our relationship, and my father and I are both closer and happier.
Dr. Claudia Six has a power and directness in her communication that cuts through layers of stories we have been telling ourselves for all of our lives. There is compassion and caring as well, but having a therapist talk with such laser precision left me questioning so many stories I have built my life around. Challenging suppositions and calling me out of old familiar hiding places. I have learned and benefited from many therapists but never have I seen powerful communication modeled so effectively. Things started shifting in the first session. Man, woman, or couples would benefit from her vast skills.
I just read your excellent article in the current Common Ground. You really nail it. Your paper is clear, concise, and challenging. Your thinking is spot on and, to me, this is your best writing ever. You seem to offer an insight that is counter-intuitive … it’s so easy to blame others and feel powerless … but it can be empowering to know about an alternative. You clarify whose stuff is whose, and you offer a way to get unstuck.
This is a great article (re affairs) and was a good reminder for me that relationship dynamics are always a two way street and that personally integrity is key! I hope I never have to face this issue but your advice is excellent!
I would like to thank Claudia for her expert advice on my relationship with myself and my daughter.
I wanted to let you know that he proposed to me Christmas Eve. What more could I ask for? It’s so exciting. It wouldn’t have happened without you….I don’t know where to begin.
If you hadn’t been there I never would have been given the tools I needed to get through last year. I have been working very hard on me, with the things you told me, and cannot underestimate how they opened other doors for me. I humbly thank you, Claudia, for listening and for knowing all that you do. The work you have put into mastering your craft, or is it a gift, both maybe, your hard work has benefitted me, my children, and him. I am immensely grateful for your key part in helping me through the maze of horror. I don’t know where I will be tomorrow or farther out, but I know I will be well and whole and happy.
In just one session, Claudia was able to identify the key to my discomfort and help me understand how my body’s life energy, sensuality and sexuality will be freed up once I work on this part of my life. Claudia guided me to seeing for myself where I was “putting a lid” on my emotions, and her insights and skill gave me the information I needed to see a way out. Thank you, Claudia!
(Claudia Six, PhD, was) straightforward, neutral, on my side, on time. I could trust her.
Claudia creates a very safe, non judgmental space to explore deep, intimate places. She brings her wisdom, experience, directness, and humor to each session. She helped me to profoundly let go of an old relationship that prevented me from more joy and love in my current marriage. She taught me much about letting go and trusting.
Claudia has the skill to know which questions to ask and the talent to know how best to ask them. With her, I explored new territory without feeling uncomfortable or embarrassed. It was very enlightening.
A sense of real sincerity.
I went to see Claudia after my divorce because I was beginning to date again, and had some insecurities about it, as well as issue around my masculinity. The result was that I found a plan of action. From there I figured out what I wanted; I now have it and am thrilled. I accomplished this in two sessions. I really appreciate Claudia’s direct, get-to-the-point approach in her work. My time is valuable and Claudia’s style makes the most of our time together.
In my first session with Dr. Claudia Six, she gave me tools to address a complaint I had of my husband. It has been the single most effective thing to have an immediate impact on our relationship and the way I now communicate with my spouse. Dr. Six made me feel confident that I could share intimately with her – she hears what I’m saying and is completely non-judgmental.
Very professional & intelligent. I was extremely impressed.
Thought provoking. You were insightful with your inquiry into my needs. In a short period of time, you asked many meaningful questions. You helped me focus on key issues. Even after just my first visit, it felt like we had covered a lot of ground.
You were really good at tackling the issues raised in a straight forward and direct manner.
I continuously praise the work you did with […] and me. I cannot rate it high enough, we both agree it was the best investment we did. We separated in the end as you may know, with a substantial amount of pain on my side, but remained friends and loving to each other. You were the obvious person when I heard […] and […] were coming across issues, I think it should be mandatory to see a couples therapist before issues arise, like car maintenance! I am very sad about their separation, and hope their work with you can alleviate some suffering.
(What most struck me was) your insight that I have difficulty tolerating feelings, (thus) that what is standing in my way is not a sex issue per se, but an issue about letting myself feel, which in turn leads to difficulties letting myself be open, which leads to difficulties with sex. You are warm, flexible, empathic, insightful, intuitive & responsive. I am grateful to you for all that.
Claudia helped me to connect the dots in my relationship with my father, and see him as not at fault. I was able to communicate that to him and help repair our relationship, which makes me feel relieved and happy.
Thank you Claudia. You are making a difference for me.
Claudia I can’t thank you enough for helping me get through this tough time in my life….I can move on at least and realize the total scope of the situation….
Words can’t say enough how you’ve helped me with the relationship I’ve always wanted and needed in my life…less is so much more in this case…Thank you!
Claudia is a brilliant therapist. I saw her in regards to my relationship with my daughter. She pinpointed the problem in one session which was quite amazing. It was like finding the missing puzzle piece. It was very liberating.