I can safely say that almost everyone who has come in to see me the past 30 years has complained about ‘communication’. It seems to plague all of us at some point. The thing is, people are always communicating.
When people complain about communication it's usually because they don't like the communication they're getting. People always communicate. A lot of what I do is translate what couples are saying to each other.
I unmask hidden feelings which are not expressed clearly but which are being reacted to. When one person is even a little emotionally activated, even if they make ‘I’ statements, if there is an edge to their voice, the other will react, and then they might fight or argue. It doesn’t have to be that way. Getting clear about what you are actually communicating helps dispel disagreements and hurt feelings.
Also, men and women inherently communicate differently. For an entertaining look at the differences, watch this YouTube video. There is wisdom in accepting the brain differences between genders, and working with them, not against them.
Faulty beliefs that we have about ourselves impact how we communicate. If you think that you don’t deserve, or that your needs don’t matter, you are likely to communicate in a way that leads to you not getting what you need, and to your faulty belief being reinforced. As a communication specialist, I can help you become aware of how that dynamic plays out in your life.
And you know what, all this applies to sex. The most vulnerable, charged, and potentially rewarding aspect of our life is not immune to poor communication. How you communicate in the rest of your world is no different from how you communicate around sex.
I offer sex therapy services to people in Marin County and the San Francisco Bay Area, and internationally, via Skype or phone.
Every single person who has called me the past 30 years, has requested better communication. Think you might want to work with me? The first step is to make sure we're a good fit. Contact me here