Difficult conversations are those that we all put off—sometimes for a long time. The conversations we’d frankly rather not have because they’ll make the other person uncomfortable. Truth is, they’ll make us uncomfortable. These are the conversations that we hope we will never need to have.
Articles by Dr. Six
Dr. Claudia Six has published many articles in Common Ground, as well as on popular blogs like YourTango and MindBodyGreen. To invite Dr. Six to write a guest article for your publication, download her author one-sheet.
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How often do you think about food? Shame and self-loathing are often part of the relationship with food. Do you think about what you want to eat that you shouldn’t, because it might make you fat? Do you bargain with yourself, adding up calories in your head, then repenting with the promise of a salad? Moreover, how often do you think about your body? And, truth be told, how often do you think about your body positively? The vast majority of American women have a poor body image. And the positive view of the rest is hard earned and sometimes only sporadic.
EROTIC INTEGRITY™: How to be True to Yourself Sexually by Dr. Claudia Six Common Ground February, 2012 Excerpt ‘Erotic Integrity’: two words that we don’t usually put together. Yet the concept underlies everyone’s sexual and romantic behavior. Erotic is defined as “dealing with sexual love” & integrity means “adhering to a code of values,” according
In the twenty years I’ve been coaching couples, when clients call in for their initial consultation, they usually mention poor communication. They complain that their partner doesn’t know how to communicate, won’t communicate, won’t respond to their communication, has poor communication skills, has a long history of poor communication, comes from a family of poor communicators… As I listen, I’m translating. To me it’s all code for the fact that people always communicate; they just may not like the communication they’re getting. And they’re hurt, frustrated, feel stuck, hopeless, angry, scared.
People who have been cheated on usually want to distract themselves by speculating and perseverating about why the offender was unfaithful: fear of commitment, an overriding need for validation, thrill seeking, anxiety, sex addiction, yearning for freedom, and so on. While some of these reasons may be accurate, focusing on the other person rather than on yourself is not empowering. So what can you do after your partner has had an affair?
Part of a healthy lifestyle is relationship maintenance. When something lights up on the dashboard of your car, or it makes a funny noise, you don’t wait for AAA to be towing it away to talk to your mechanic. When your teeth hurt, you don’t wait until you need a root canal to see your dentist. It’s the same with relationships. Don’t wait until you’re in pain, or worse yet, in crisis.