How to Handle Yourself after your Partner Has an Affair
by Dr. Claudia Six
Published in Common Ground
People who have been cheated on usually want to distract themselves by speculating and perseverating about why the offender was unfaithful: fear of commitment, an overriding need for validation, thrill seeking, anxiety, sex addiction, yearning for freedom, and so on. While some of these reasons may be accurate, focusing on the other person rather than on yourself is not empowering. So what can you do after your partner has had an affair?
This may be a good time to remind you that it’s not personal. Your partner didn’t stray because you’re not attractive enough, fat or thin enough, rich enough, or acrobatic enough in bed. They strayed because they are out of integrity with themselves and because they chose to prioritize something else over commitment. That’s their stuff. Back to you.